Gods Of Egypt (2016)

ALEX PROYAS

Bil’s rating (out of 5):  B.  USA/Australia, 2016.  , , .  Screenplay by , .  Cinematography by .  Produced by , Alex Proyas.  Music by .  Production Design by .  Costume Design by .  Film Editing by .  

This one’s the Battlefield Earth of Egypt movies, a film so inane that The Mummy looks like serious research by comparison.  In a land where gods walk among the mortals they rule over (they’re basically the same as us except way taller and their blood looks like you busted open a can of gold spray paint), Horus () is to be crowned king when his evil uncle Set () shows up, kills his own brother Osiris () and takes the throne for himself.  His eyes plucked out and living in exile, Horus is sad and blue until a young man () hoping to resurrect his lost love restores one of Horus’ eyes and they set off to make things right.  Bad action sequences and poor visual effects rob you of the few pleasures that could possibly make up for so much bad writing and acting, while Alex Proyas directs like he’s screwing it up on purpose to get back at someone.  The predominately Anglo-looking cast playing Egyptians only contributes to just how laughable this one is.

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