Bil’s rating (out of 5): 0.
USA, 2003. , DreamWorks, Imagine Entertainment. Screenplay by Alec Berg, David Mandel, Jeff Schaffer, based on the book by Dr. Seuss. Cinematography by Emmanuel Lubezki. Produced by Brian Grazer. Music by David Newman. Production Design by Alex McDowell. Costume Design by Rita Ryack. Film Editing by Don Zimmerman.
It’s rather difficult to decide what’s the worst aspect of this dreadful adaptation of the popular Dr. Seuss novel. Could it be the painfully queasy production design that seems to have cost a bundle of money but at the same time looks incredibly cheap? Maybe it’s the disgusting screenplay that takes Seuss’s charming dialogue and adds cheap fart jokes to “modernize” it for today’s audiences. Most of the annoyance must lie in the excrementally bad performance by Mike Myers, who is so unappealing as to force you to look away from the screen. He plays the magical cat who shows up at the home of two precocious youngsters (Spencer Breslin, Dakota Fanning) and turns their house upside down on the day that their hardworking single mother (Kelly Preston) is having a company party. Meanwhile, evil neighbour Alec Baldwin is masquerading as a suave suitor to convince Preston to marry him, thereby allowing him to send Breslin to military school and be rid of him for good. The plot’s obvious inevitability is not what ruins the film, it’s the fact that you just can’t get to the end soon enough while you’re watching it. I warn you, some audience members might experience actual physical pain from watching this stinky pile of kitty litter.