Say Uncle (2005)

PETER PAIGE

Bil’s rating (out of 5):  B.  USA, 2005.  Best Little Boy Productions, Full Paige Productions, Archer Productions.  Screenplay by Peter Paige.  Cinematography by . Produced by Peter Paige, .  Music by .  Production Design by .  Costume Design by .  Film Editing by .  Podcast:  Bad Gay Movies.

wrote and directed this unwatchable mess about a single man whose entire life revolves around his adoration for his godson. When the boy’s mother () announces that her husband has taken a job in Japan and the entire family is moving away, Paige finds himself without purpose in life. He can’t face his job and so loses it and avoids all his friends, until he discovers the joy of the local playground and charms the park mommies with his easy way with children. When one of the mothers () realizes that Paige is not accompanying any child to the park, her mind immediately rests on the darkest assumption, and trouble ensues. This is supposed to be a satiric look at human suspicion and the difficulties that arise when people point such easily accusing fingers at each other, and the point it is making would come across a lot better except for two issues: there’s absolutely no humour in this supposed comedy, which features dreadfully lazy editing and a lackluster pace, and also, we as an audience are kind of creeped out by him too. It’s sweet that he loves his best friend’s child as if it were his own, but he apparently has no friends or love life and actually stops going to work because the boy moves away. I don’t assume there’s anything nasty going on there, but it stands to reason that there is something wrong with this person, and the film does not shore up enough sympathy with him (or spend enough time showing us his relationship with the boy previous to his leaving) to explain it away. Don’t watch it.

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